You had the compassion to be kind
to yourself first, and then to others, because, as it turns out, we can’t
practice compassion with other people if we never give compassion to ourselves
kindly. ~Erica
When my parents divorced I told
myself not to cry. I held that cry in for years. I would literally bite my lip
and say “Don’t cry. Be strong. Be courageous.” I was 14 years old. I
thought holding it in was the courageous thing to do. To be brave like an
adult, move on, and get up and live my life.
Now, I am 24 years old, I've almost
spent a quarter of a century. It took many years for me to develop the courage
to show emotion in front of other people. I had a very hard time as an actress,
being vulnerable or crying alone in the world—an island of silence in a sea of
noise. However, it is most absolutely my bliss being able to share and talk and
teach—to be a role model—and take people on a journey where they can discover
what courage means for them.
“It takes courage to grow up and
become who you really are.” ~E. E. Cummings
Courage is something that everybody
wants — an attribute of good character that makes us worthy of respect. Yet
courage is not just physical bravery. Developing the quality of courage is
essential to achieving anything in our lives. Courage is required before we can
take action in any endeavor, and it is courageous people in every field who
tend to achieve their goals and realize their dreams.
The fear that can summon moral
courage takes many forms: fear of job loss, fear of poverty, fear of losing
friends, fear of criticism, fear of ostracism, fear of embarrassment, fear of
making enemies, fear of losing status, to name but a few potential human fears.
Fear is negative energy. Courage is
positive energy that arises when fear is set-aside. Courage is not only needed
to face some of the moment-to-moment aspects of daily life, but it is critical
when faced with “spiritual weakness”.
In Buddhism, courage, or
fearlessness, is highly valued. You should not have the slightest fear in your
heart. It is lack of courage that prevents one from attaining Buddhahood.
Buddhism teaches that every single person has infinite potential, and that,
through sincere practice, each person can bring forth that potential, allowing
their abundant creativity to blossom and enabling them to contribute to the
enrichment of society and benefits all sentient beings.
Fear and courage are brothers. I
remembered that Prince Siddhartha want to be a Buddha because he was fear, fear
about getting old, sick and die. He wants to liberate the people he loves from
the same fears. From the fear he had, it also arose his courage to leave the
palace and seek a cure from his fear.
Oliver Wendell Holmes said, “Courage
is about doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're
scared. Have the courage to act instead of react."
In practice sometimes we come to
the “Plateau of Great Doubt” it is easy to quit, to let spiritual weakness have
it’s way. Applying the energy of courage we can see past that doubt to a
continuing path. We can employ courage to delve deeper into study, to find new
commitment to practice, and to ask those questions we’ve may have hesitated to
ask before. Courage is a positive character trait.
Buddhism also teaches that our
efforts to expand and develop our lives will inevitably be met by resistance,
often severe, from both within and without. It is by persevering in the face of
these obstacles and triumphing over them that we are able to unlock the rich
possibilities of our lives and manifest our inherent enlightenment. Normally, we choose to engage with problems
and issues rather than avoid them. Realizing ways to turn those problems and
issues to harmonious and happy results for everyone involved takes the energy
that comes from courage.
Buddhist teachings place great
emphasis on wisdom, and it is easy to see how a simple lack of wisdom is the
cause of many of the problems.
Closely linked to the exercise of
courage is conviction—conviction in the right and possibility of oneself and
others to be happy, free and fulfilled. Such conviction is the basis of social
justice and is the core vision on which Buddhism is founded. It is a fierce,
unyielding commitment to such a vision that endows the Buddha with the quality
of fearlessness.
Courage is a component of each of
the Buddhist refinements. A real practice of generosity, situational ethics and
morality, and acceptance require us to tap into our sense of courageous thought
and action. Courage requires a Buddhist to go beyond self-interest to a
realization that there are instances when one must endure the possibility of
self-loss. We must be willing to set aside our own interests in order to
achieve something larger than ourselves, Buddhism thus views courage as a vital
element of compassionate action to help others—as well as key to our ability to
change our own lives. Its core courage is a generosity of spirit that
transcends our sense of self.
What may look like a small act of
courage is courage nevertheless. The important thing is to be willing to take a
step forward. Have Courage — Don’t live your
life out of fear, but live your life out of your convictions. Don’t be afraid to take a stand, to express a
conviction. Don’t be afraid to
love. Don’t be afraid to do what wisdom
tells you needs to be done. This doesn’t
mean that you should be in other people’s faces or take foolhardy risks. It just means that your existence should be
life-affirming, not fear-based and avoidant.
Have Courage and Be Kind. ~
Cinderella
